Just Do It

Chalice Level: Full

I sooooo did not want to come in tonight from meditation. I really was not outside long, maybe 10 minutes? It was so nice and quite. And the incense smelled sooooooo good. But I dragged myself back in :-) see how special you are? whoever you?

I had so much running through my head for what needs to be done. And I also needed to write for 2 days instead of 1 since I missed yesterday, but I am tellin ya. I had a VERY good reason, complete and utter exhaustion!

So after my last entry I went to bed like I said I would, this was around 9pm. At Midnight I am woken up because my oldest is tired of watching the middle child and the hubby is working on something for the house. So I get up to take care of the middle child (his schedule is still off from the other night, we are having a very hard time getting him on track). And guess what, the real situation is that the oldest wants to be on facebook. I was so mad! I had told her already that I would be out running the next day, in the heat and that I really wanted to get some rest. She told me to go back to bed but I was wide awake at this point. I tried several times to go back to sleep during early morning hours but was just not happening. The middle child did not go to bed till very late, the youngest woke up several times and then the hubby's phone kept going off. So I gave up.

I leave around a quarter to nine in the morning, I wanted to leave early enough to get food but that did not work out since I was having a very difficult time getting the hubby to go out of the house. So I wound up being out all day with no food. I had to meet with a psychic at a local shop and then meet with the belly dance director for entertainment for the ball. Finally around 4pm when I was meeting with the director for the belly dancers she gave me a little food that a friend had made. I had mentioned earlier when I spoke to her over the phone that I might stop to get something to eat since I had not had lunch yet. Everywhere I stopped had no restaurants! I couldn't believe it!

Anyhow the meeting with the director went very well. I really like her a lot, and she is so all about helping the community out. She also owns her own vegetarian cafe which is downtown in the art district. She had all these fabulous ideas of how to help out the Ball, the non-profit and even me! She mentioned about doing a "meet the artist" thing for my photography, which I am beyond excited about. But I need to get a website, and biz cards first. I might also be able to do some readings at a monthly event, so this is very exciting! She was also a great listener, I kinda unloaded on her about the problems I'd had with the other members of my non-profit before it had become a non-profit.

I was so tired that on the way home I kept dozing off, and I NEVER do that. I finally stopped doing that when i crouched onto the shoulder of the person next to me!!! which I REALLY never do. I apologized and she seemed to think it was funny, but I sure didn't! I think she was less upset cause she remembers being a mom of a small baby (she was an older lady) but little did she know that at that point I had not hardly slept at all. Anyhow once I got to the last stop for my end of town it was like 7:30 at night and I had pretty much not eaten anything all day, except for the little bit the director had given me. I had my youngest with me and I really did not drink near enough water, and I breastfeed. So when I got to the last stop, I got some food. Went home, took a shower and crashed in the extra bedroom (which is also the coldest, yay!) at about 10pm. I guess the little one was also tired cause she only woke up twice in the time I was asleep. I woke up on my own eventually, and it looked like the sun was just coming up. But I felt pretty good so I got up anyhow. I sat down in the living room and started talking with my hubby, it still looked pretty dark outside so I did not think much until I saw our clock, it was 12:30pm!!! I had slept 14 hours! I guess I really was beat, and so was the baby. She was still sleeping when I woke up and she went to bed about the same time as I did. You do what you gotta do, at almost any cost when you are the one that needs to do it. In this case it was not sleeping, not eating, not drinking much water, & spending and entire day on the bus system with a baby in 115 temperatures, oh and walking a total of about 1 1/2 miles in the middle of the day. Just do it, was my motto for this whole experience.

I was still feeling tired today so I moved pretty slow. But I did get some work done for the Ball and even better, I finally decided I needed to get crakin on the solicitation letters I plan to send out to businesses. This is not an area I am very good at, and I was feeling pretty lost with the whole idea. It is not so bad contacting the company and telling them I would like to send a donation request letter but I didn't have anything good coming out of my head for the donation letter. I googled pagan solicitation letters, and nada! Wiccan solicitation letters, nada again! Wiccan donation letters, nope. And finally Pagan Donation letters, and finally we have a winner!!! And it is a really good letter two. It is not too long, give some information about the organization, how it could benefit the company/ person donating and even better, a small description about Paganism. This is exactly what I needed to expound upon for my organization :-) But the funny thing is (or not so funny) is that this was the ONLY letter I found that is a solicitation for a Pagan organization. Why is that!!! Yes, I know that we are not well known and often have crazy things that people think we are but other organizations really are not trying at least? Actually, so many companies are looking for minorities to help it is astonishing to me that more of our non-profits are not attempting to go this route for help.

Anyhow moving on, I forgot to mention that my eldest has had an offer to be in a bad. The director that I mentioned earlier found out what instrument my kido plays and how fast she picks up on the learning aspect and she offered her an opportunity to be in the bad. I think this is wonderful! So I will be contacting the director tomorrow to let her know. What a blessing this woman has become already!

So the drama for the day is that my eldest has the mother of her boyfriend telling her that he does not want to be with her which totally devastated her. Oh that's right, that's how I woke up, she was all upset! That's OK, I think I was ready to get up anyhow and she needed to hear that it was all her boyfriends mom's fault. I swear the woman is absolutely nuts! We plan to allow him to stay with us as soon as he turns 18. Unfortunately we cannot do much till then, just wait. And the anticipation of waiting to hear from him for my oldest is agonizing. He is currently in a different city and only calls when he can get his hands on his moms phone or borrows someones phone to call. The have not seen each other in a couple of months. He is absolutely nuts about her and treats her really well. I seriously doubt he wants to break up with her.

What else? I think that is about it for tonight.
TTFN

Busy Brain

Chalice Level: To the brim


 Today was a pretty good day. I enjoyed it very much. I think mostly cause I am in "productive" mode, which always makes me feel accomplished, lol.

 So I did the taste testing, my long time friend (since like kindergarten) and the two new ladies I met a few days ago all went to it. We were VERY late, but you know what? I think it worked out for the best since the food sat for a while before we ate it. That let me know how well the food keeps!

I did find out an interesting tid bit of information. The chef told me that the member that I was butting heads with had told her that she could not reschedule the appointment because we needed to get the ball rolling for the Ball as far as food went! This is a big deal because I specifically asked her to find out if they had any other dates available since I would be out of town and the new member had plans that day. So the two members that went to the taste testing were given a huge variety of food to taste and apparently narrowed it down to what we would be using at the Ball and so what we ate tonight!!! And said that they would schedule another taste test for when I and the new girl could make it.

 The more I hear about what was happening behind the scenes (like checks being mailed to home addresses instead of the P.O. Box, with no heads up to me) the more I am infuriated by what was happening. How could the other two members NOT see what was going on? Unless of course it was ME who was not seeing what was really happening. Which as time goes by I think is more and more the case. It was not just this one member that was the problem but ALL of them, and they were trying to slowly shove me out of the picture even though I was the creator of this group. I think what bothers me more is that my supposed friend was along for the ride? And the more I hear, the more I think that she was aware of what was happening and wanted to see me out of this as well. That is what is most bothersome to me. And here I was feeling guilty for making her life so much more difficult with having changed passwords on her and not telling her. At the time I really did not know what else to do since I needed to protect all areas of my group without risk, and at the time I felt she was a small risk. I figured I would try to make a mends afterward when I could see clearly where the members were all going. Obviously I made the correct decision since I think it was me that was not seeing the other two members involvement instead of them not seeing this one members agenda. That sucks.

 So moving on, today is a at the brim day. I have the down payment for the food, and I am working on the one for the alcohol. I need to now get moving on the liquor license so that I make sure everything is a go with that.

 I had a great time at the taste testing and was in such a great mood that I nearly finished the web page about the food that the general public will have access too. I had a really difficult time leaving that so that I could go meditate since my brain was having a very difficult time shutting down. But I missed yesterday. I went out to meditate but the sun was coming up and the flies came out to play with me. They were driving me nuts cause I had two that every time I would start to sink into meditation one would land on me and throw me off. I finally gave up on that and tried to meditate on my bed, but I fell asleep pretty quickly I guess cause I don't remember going past the root stage.

 So finances are stressful at the moment. More so with household money that biz money. Although I need to up my budget, obviously, for the Ball. I think it will all fall into place. As far as house money though, the hubby is still not making much at cab driving. And we have no other prospects of money. I feel like things will fall into place, I am pretty calm about it in comparison to similar situations happening in the past. But the hubby on the other hand is overly stressed. The only thing that comes to mind is that the Goddess will bring to us what we need. We are on the right track.

 Gotta go, TTFN