Today did not have any terribly exciting events but it did have some small blessings :-)
My Paypal account for my organization has FINALLY been cleared up. It has been like two months of one hassle after another and I was finally able to transfer the several hundred dollars that was in non-profits account to the bank account for the non-profit. This is a HUGE deal because a good portion of the ticket sales from the Ball and Vendor fee's have been payed online through Paypal. So what a relief that this headache has gone away!!!
Since the account was cleared up a few days ago I was able to transfer the money then and it hit the account today. I bought several things including business cards, a filling cabinet (it locks so my wonderful toddler son cannot open, at least that is the idea. I guess time will tell.), hanging folders, paper etc. This will help to make it a lot easier to function all this from home.
I got to see my mom today, I miss her very much but I think we are both happier. She moved in with my Aunt several months ago because my Uncle died suddenly. My mom at first went for what was supposed to be only a few weeks. Then she said it would be at least a few months, then a year and now two is the plan. I knew when my Uncle died that she would live with my Aunt longer than she thought she would. They are such close sisters, and I am so happy my mom was able to stay with my Aunt at a time when she really needed her sister. Our family has been happier with the distance between us too, I love my mom but it was becoming very difficult to live with her. I am an adult and she sometimes still looks at me as a child that needs to be scolded. And I let her do it so as not to get into a fight. Shame on me I know, but she has been such an amazing support to me through out my life, I love and respect her very much and try not to argue with her. I know she will not be around forever. Now when we are together I feel like I can enjoy the time with her and not worry about arguments. I do wish I got to see her more often, but I think the living situation is really good now.
Another blessing is new friends. When a meditated a few nights ago I was feeling a bit down. That is part of the reason I started this blog. I always am able to work through my problems better when I write my feelings and ideas down.
Anyhow my issue is that I recently lost my best friend of about 2 years to chaos that happened with my organization. I called the meeting and made the suggestion to start a non-profit last year. I asked several people to help me out, one of which was this friend of mine. After the initial start up, the planners turned out to be myself, my friend and an acquaintance. The acquaintance and I repeatedly butted heads over one thing or another but what really bugged me was that she would have little put downs for me. These drove me up a WALL! I kept ignoring them and on occasion would fire back at her almost as subtly as she would make the comments. I talked to my close friends and all of them, except the one who is helping me with the organization, said I need to trust my gut.
Fast forward several months and enters a new member to help with the planning of the Ball and the start up of this non-profit. She is involved for about a month and a half when I have had the last straw with this member I butt heads with. After much meditation, and discussion with other people including some that have non-profits of their own, I legally reserve the name for the non-profit (up to this point we did not have any official documents since we were acting with the help of another non-profit in our community) with the help of my wonderful and amazing magickal mentor. Then I send of an email telling the problem member that things will change, and that these changes must happen for us to continue to work together. As I suspected she would, she resigned but not before telling me what she thought of me. She also emailed the letter to the other two members and apparently they thought she was in the right so they both left the group. This includes my friend, who is now the best of friends with the member that I was butting heads with and pretty much has not wanted to have anything to do with me since. We are cordial when we see each other but that is it. It hurts to know that she traded me in so fast for another person. I know she was hurt by some of the collateral damage of the situation, but I cant believe that warrants writing off an entire friendship! To each their own. I am still kinda wounded over it, but at the same time I have no desire to have a friendship with her again, not after knowing that she could write our friendship off so fast and apparently not think twice since she now has a couple of new BFF's.
So now that I have caught you all (who ever you are, if any) up on the lack of best friend angle I can move on to today. So a few nights ago I was asking the Goddess to show me some people in my area that I can socialize with. Currently my longtime friend and sister within the Goddess lives on the other side of town, which btw is a BIG town, so we don't see each other very often. Other than my family, I feel kinda lonely as far as the friendship area goes. The Goddess directed me to Witchvox and I thought "OK, done that before but will do it again, don't expect anything new". So I checked it out and sure enough, a new Coven had formed in my area and was looking for members. Now I have never looked really for a coven because I did not want to have to follow a particular path. But this Coven was an ecclectic Coven and the common bond is a desire to better the community. Both the traditional community that we live in as well as the community of Pagans. This is totally the type of people I want to associate with! The Coven director emailed me back today, and so I gave her a call like she suggested. We had a wonderful conversation from the get go, she and the assistant/ co director were able to meet with me this evening. That meeting went just as well as the talk on the phone. I believe I have found MY new BFF's and they amount to a hell of a lot more than the one person I had before to regularly hang out with. And honestly, it was becoming very apparent before out falling out, that our values were different. So maybe she needed to exit my life to make it so I would find these others that are much better suited to my path? Oh, and on top of the excellent conversation I had with them. The Coven would like to volunteer to help out at the Ball and for the non-profit in general.
Things definitely seem to be turning around from the point I was in last month. I was having panic attacks (I had never had those before) when I thought about the difficulties I would be dealing with and the amount of work that needed to be done with no help at that point.
TTFN
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